FTE On Tour_ARIZONA & The Grand Canyon 8/19

Arizona & The Grand Canyon

Lunette's rear left tire has a slow leak in it. Thank gooodness for FREE AIR at truck stops.
After checking the oil & filling the tires, we press on westward to Arizona. A lot can be said about the majestic splendor of the Grand Canyon. But I won't. I'll let the pictures do the talking.







We woke up at our campsite in the Grand canyon to some unexpected guests: a heard of Elk. Whoa. Huge, beautiful animals that make tiny noises like air escaping from a balloon. We took pics, smiled, packed up and headed out to fill Lunette's gas tank.


















Diesel gas turns out to be more expensive than expected so we put in just enough to get us to our next destination: Los Angeles.

Lunette the bus starts acting strange, bucking wildly upon acceleration. We pull over at a truck stop and a friendly couple (Danny and Mama Sue) take a peek under the hood. Turns out we bought BAD DIESEL GAS!


After filling the tank with Good diesel, Danny & Sue invite us to pick vegetables from Sue's organic garden; a small oasis of love, color & flavor in the middle of the desert. We picked amazing veggies (and cantalope OFF THE VINE!) while singing our signature tune 'The Magic song". Mama Sue thanked us repeatedly, teary eyed and happy.






And with a full tank of GOOD gas (!), a bushel full of organic fruits & vegetables and Mama Sue's blessing, we head for the City of Angles.

FTE On Tour_TEXAS: (Part 3;Final) 8/16-"Love In Iraan"

OUT OF GAS.

Smack dab in the middle of Texas. Hmm.

The Fairies realised that they must've miscalculated thier diesel gas reserve. Lunette is is fiesty, hard-workin' '93 ford with a lot of get-up-n' go and good brakes. She purrs like a kitten and runs like a stallion. But her gas gauge is...a bit off. Could be a half-tank, could be a quarter, could be running on frickin' fumes.

Our assesment of (actually) how much gas we have needed to be adjusted. Since she gets ____ miles to the gallon and the tanks holds ____ gallons, we would have to get a refill every _______miles. OOOOOK. Now we know. now all we have to do is get some help.

Huge trucks whizz by, stirring up a swirl of Texas dust with Texas heat. The fairies whips into action, quickly creating a huge sign that says, "OUT OF DEISEL. NEED HELP". (Fairies need spellcheck too.)

The sign stops a guy in a truck who responds with "What do 'ya want me ta do about it?". Hmm. Not the help we were looking for.

Another truck stops. A friendly gentleman (Terrance) from Florida steps out and asks what he can do. C•SPOT & ROSE spring into action and hop into the back of his truck as ERIN and myself wait in Lunette.

30 minutes pass. No fairies. The sun beats down on ERIN & I as we pace & hydrate.

Just then, we are joined by a Texas State Trooper. He was shockingly cool for a cop. He hung out with us and told us stories about the area. Apparently, we were at a prime spot for illegals traveling from Mexico.

He also offered us to sit in his car (for the air conditioning) and played his iPod through the car's sound system. He rocked Dave Chapelle's "P*ss On You" and a selection of songs by 50 Cent. Hmm. Not MY idea of a Texas state trooper. I stand corrected. One size does NOT fit all.

After about an hour and a half (And a visit from another trooper who traded stories about Speeders) ROSE & C•Spot returns with plastic containers filled with deisel...I mean, diesel gas.
We put in the gas, spilling it all over ourselves, hop on the bus, stick the key in the ignition and...

Lunette refuses to start. Too much air in the gas line. The trooper calls his mechanic friend who comes and helps us out. He sprays ether (an explosive aerosal) into the motor with a lit cigarette dangling from his lip. I suppose you call this "Texas Style".

We finally get on our way as the sky darkens into another pitch black starscape. Tired and hungry, we pull into a Kwicky mart/ Godfather's Pizza for rest stop. Parked in the front lot was a pickup truck with the Haliburton logo on the side. I was suddenly overcome with an urge to sing OBAMASONG.

The Faries keep spirits up by dancing to a car alarm. Two men notice this and strike up a conversation. They are very cool oil welders who invite us to camp at thier trailer park. After getting a mess of BBQ wings from the pizza shop, we headed over to set up our next fairy camp-with a bunch o' good ol' boys and a couple 'o cases o' Bud.

For the rest of the night, we laughed and sang and had a great time with these guys. They were perfect gentlemen with great stories a Hi-Tech RV that they gave us unlimited access to.

We must have made a good impression (I don't think they've ever seen faries before) because they told us that they would PAY for us to stay and do a show for their small Texan trailer park community.

Rose cooks up a mulligan stew, we trade jokes, drink too much beer and sleep.

After sleeping in (Whew! we needed that!), we wrote a new (adult) fairytale about a Dragon/Fairy relationship and performed it for the guys.


They were delighted and favored the love scene. It was one of our best shows, yet.










Our Host Was BRIAN (Angel of Texas#2) and CUP (sorry, didn't get the last names) who were quite forthcoming with unconditional love and support for our mission. BRIAN let us ride his motorbike and CUP shared with us his stories of being in the Rodeo (and in the Navy S.E.A.L.s).

The Constable of IRAAN, TEXAS stopped by to chat, quite entertained by the fairies. He assured us that we were breaking no laws by drinking 40 beers.

Exhaling a sigh of relief, we continued to chill with him.

After he left, 3 unmarked cop cars pull up and 3 Sheriff's deputies get out.

"The constable called you. Right? Told you there were some faries here, right?", I asked them, directly.

"Yup.", They replied. "You guys are fine. We're just gonna hang."

Exhaling another sigh of relief,

we continued to chill, getting our "Texas Style" buzz on.

(ROSE'S hysterical Youtube VIDEO)

We awaken to the blazing hot Texas sun, hopefully for the last time. After a quick fairy meeting we decide to leave the SEXTOPUS sculpture on Brian's RV as an installation.

And in a blast of Texas dust & heat, Lunette scurries away, westward & beyond.


NEXT: THE ROSWELL EXPERIENCE

FTE On Tour_TEXAS (Part 2) 8/14, 8/15

Whew! That was a long bus ride. The fairies exploded in a burst of creative energy. Making costumes, screen-printing t-shirts, writing new fairytales and having outdoor song rehearsals. Within 5 minutes of landing in AUSTIN, TEXAS we had a gig.

The first was a Eastern European fashion show and dance party at a club called "The Cockpit". The door admission was reduced for entry in makeup. C•spot and Erin spread fabulous fairy magic at the door, offering a place to sit and be made up for a small donation.

Our next performance was in a park at an all-day outdoor electronica party. The DJ's were off the hook. They let me get on the mic. I even got a chance to hold a real pair of Nunchakus. The guy who owns them lights them on fire and works out. I'd like to see Chuck Norris do that shit.








ROSE & ERIN painted masterpieces in the sun as Triphop, Downtemop and Acid Jazz filled the woods.
















After the show, we pack up the bus and haul over to Odeil's house to prepare for our journey west. After a bite to eat we sleep.

The next morning we say goodbye to our most gracious host who made our Austin trip so special. After re-packing the bus and getting well caffinated, we set off westward.




OH SHIT! OUT OF GAS!!

Yep. Right in the middle of Texas.

FTE On Tour_TEXAS (Part 1) 8/13

As the sun sets in the Houston skyline, we bullet through Texas into a horizon etched with pink, peach and purple streaks. The faint aroma of an "Icy Hot" product waifs through Lunette's interior as ROSE ROBIN reclines with a strained back, sleeping soundly. Hopefully she'll feel better soon, as she savors the last remaining flavor of the homemade Pecan Pie we just had from the TIGER DINER. Yeah. We ate real good in New Orleans.

Darkness falls quickly and the candy-colored sunset gives way to a black sky filled with Texas stars. Still about an hour and a half away from Austin...time to start looking for a place to camp.

Riding through BRENHAM, TX we spot a sign for Rocky Creek Park and turn onto a gravel road which takes us to a rusty gate that's locked tight. After backing out to re-trace our steps, in the pitch blackness we see a light. It looks like a hotel sign.

"Maybe they know where we can camp.", we thought, making our way toward the sign.

We pull into the parking lot of a huge roadhouse lodge called "TOAD HOLLOW ICE HOUSE".
















It was a bar/resturant with a large outdoor seating area. The entire structure was made out of brand new cedar.

I immediately harbor a queasy, unsettled feeling-having seen cheezy movies about angry rednecks that hang outsiders for being at the wrong place at the wrong time.

Our brightly-colored "Hippie" bus pulls into the parking lot.

C•Spot & Erin hop out and bounce over to a tall, slender blonde woman sitting in the back area, beaming with fairy smiles.

I scrunch down a little deeper into my seat.

The two return, sporting even wider smiles.

"They said we can stay here! Told us to pull around to the rear!", they sing with glee.

"They did?", I warble, swallowing hard. The bad New Yorker inside of me twitches a little, deathly afraid of being lynched by unfriendly Locals. Shit, a bunch of "Townies" in New Orleans gave us the wrong directions on purpose and we ended up getting rescued by a kind family who gave us a map of the area, stern warnings about where NOT to walk and smiles.

I swallow hard again as a few people hanging out in the roadhouse's huge picnic area come over to the bus for a closer look.

"Her name is "Lunette", C•Spot cheerfully tells them, smiling happily and covered in glitter. The onlookers are delighted. No match for strong fairy magic.

A (hot blonde) woman named Jennifer invites us to sit down and have some beers. I breathe a sigh of relief and get off the bus. She introduces us to a cool guy named Wayne, her boyfriend Mike (The manager) and Tammy (the owner) There is nothing but love at this place. Love for us in Texas. So much for the "Avatarded New Yorker's" pre-concieved notions about Texans & southern hospitality. I now stand humbled in the face of Texas love.

Mike invites us to camp in the area behind the roadhouse. We can't make a fire because of the state's "Burn Ban" (real dry, no rain) so Rose makes Fried Okra on our camping stove. Yum. Tents go up. We sleep.

We awaken up to strong coffee, awesome oatmeal, enormous breakfast burritos and WAYNE who greets us with a friendly "Good Morning Fairies!". As the morning manager does the blog, we plug in our computers and do a quick edit before hitting the road. After giving ROSE her first ride in a '69 muscle car, Wayne gives us some magic items (See Rose's "Toad's Hollow" video) and we speed off into the dry Texas heat.






Charlotte seems to have an eye for funky little coffee joints. As we speed through Giddings, Texas she pulls Lunette over (or, visa versa) to a cute little yellow coffee shop with a drive through window called "THE BUZZ BEAN". (www.giddingsbuzzbean.com)









The sign out front read " Sit 'n sip in the rear". We park Lunette and walk around the back to find a cute little porch with tables & chairs. A woman named JO greets us with a friendly smile, an ash tray for our rollies and some of the best coffee we've ever had.











"I can't believe I didn't wear my bumble bee costume today!", she said as we threw our heads back and enjoyed a good laugh inbetween sips of sexy Iced Mocha frapps and "Mango Tango" fresh fruit smoothies. Also impressive was the air conditioning in the Buzz bean's interior and the in-house book swap. Jo gives us a magic item (A silver lighter cover with a FAIRY on it) and our jaws drop. After a round of information exchanges and REAL hugs, we set off to Austin.


We arrive in AUSTIN, TEXAS at the BOUDIN CREEK COFFEEHOUSE and meet our contact: an amazing soul named ODEIL. After a real good BBQ veggie burger (and lots of coffee) we drive to her house to plan our next bit of fairy madness.